Bonnie Support Services

Bonnie Support Services

Breaking Patterns

I’m Anyce, the new family worker here at Bonnie’s. In my role, I help women and children who are escaping domestic violence find safety, freedom and a better life. 

Even though I’m only a few weeks into the job, it feels like I’ve been doing it forever… Because well, I kind of have. 

In the past 25 years I worked with people. I’ve worked with women and children, people experiencing homelessness, people struggling with mental health and people with drug and alcohol addiction. A lot of my job has been in helping people end cycles of abuse or ‘break patterns’ that are unhealthy and don’t serve them. But even before my professional career began, breaking patterns has always been a constant theme in my life.

I’ve probably broken most of, if not all of the cultural and social norms that I grew up with.  As a kid I always knew I didn’t want the white picket fence or the family straight away, but I wanted to travel and experience the world first. I chose to live life on my own terms and not on the terms of my family or culture. This wasn’t normal and choosing this path didn’t come without its difficulty, but my urge for something different was stronger than anything I’d ever experienced. There’s nothing more empowering than knowing you can change the future. And now this is what I continue to do not just for myself, but for others also. 

As a social worker, my biggest learning has been seeing the impact one’s trauma can have on diminishing their capacity to live a full, active and empowered life. How difficult it can be for people to break their patterns when their trauma is so deep. So a few years ago I decided to become re-qualified as a holistic health practitioner and learn more about how trauma affects the body, the mind and one’s ability to move forward. 

Now as a holistic health practitioner with a social welfare background, I understand the importance of being trauma-informed when working with women who are seeking to break the cycle of abuse and are wanting to make a change. 

For many women leaving domestic violence, a big challenge can be this exact change they undergo before finding freedom. It’s not just a physical change of moving house, but it’s emotional, psychological and holistic changes too. It’s a journey of change which involves discovering independence, self- identity, their place in the world, what they stand for, and ultimately self-empowerment to hopefully choose a life on their terms. And it’s not always easy. I know that. But I tell them, because I have experienced it myself and seen it many times over, with change comes new beginnings. With change comes hope and inspiration for a new life. And change is always possible. 

Blog by Anyce

Image supplied by CANVA

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